I have to honest with you: when I came back to school this semester, I toyed with closing my blog.
To be more accurate, I toyed with simply letting it sit, un-updated and gathering dust. Trying to update it seemed futile: keeping anything like a regular posting schedule was well nigh impossible with last semester’s hectic schedule and while I anticipated blogging at least a little over my four-week Christmas break, my habits were so lazy and inconsistent that I almost forgot I had a blog or even a computer. (I think I checked my email twice and only checked Facebook when someone else asked me to.)
That aside, I began wondering if I wanted to talk about diabetes anymore. My diabetes was almost the only thing I talked about over the summer as I was adjusting physically and emotionally. Once the semester started, I had other things to occupy my time and thoughts, things that were important to me like my classes and my students and my career goals. Maybe that was the way it should be. Maybe that was the way I wanted things.
So I thought about putting my diabetes in a little box in a corner and letting the blog just sit here.
And then a student came to see me during my office hour today, a transfer student brimming with questions and fears about English class. I had just sent out an email that morning letting students know that I would need to cancel an office hour next week for a doctor’s appointment, my overdue visit to the endocrinologist, so her first question was “Are you sick?”
“Oh no,”I replied. “It’s just a check up appointment. I have type 1 diabetes.”
Her face lit up and she threw her hands up in the air. “I have type 1 diabetes too!”
I already knew she had diabetes: I had students fill out info cards during the first class of the semester and she included a brief note about her diabetes at the bottom. And I was planning on telling her that I had diabetes too. But her excitement when I told her took me off guard. I realized in that moment how isolated she must have felt dealing with this disease in a new place.
I remembered that I chose to be transparent about my diabetes so that those who don’t deal with this condition have a better idea of what it’s like and so that those who also deal with it don’t need to feel alone. I chose to be open about my diabetes because others chose to be open about theirs, and as a result I’ve never felt alone with my diabetes or uninformed about my diabetes.
And I’d like to give a small something back.
That’s why I blog.